Making Gratitude a Habit

Are you tired of comparing yourself with others and competing with the people around you to see who can have the latest and greatest gizmos?  Have you figured out that advertising is just designed to separate you from your money but aren’t sure how to fight back against what can sometimes feel like a relentless tide of consumerism?
Gratitude is a good place to start.  It sounds simple enough, and it really is.  But where do you start?  How do you use gratitude to overcome competition?  How do you replace a habit of comparing yourself with everyone around you with a habit of gratitude?
Just like any new habit, it takes more work at first, but gets easier with practice.  In the beginning, you might want to sit down and actually write a gratitude list.  Find a comfortable spot, free of distractions (looking at you, Facebook and Pinterest…).  Get a pen and a piece of paper, and start writing.  Think of everything good in your life.  Loved ones tend to be pretty high on most people’s gratitude lists, but your list can also include physical things like the roof over your head, as well as less tangible things like the happy feeling you get when you play Frisbee with your dog or the challenging and rewarding job you have.  The more the merrier.
If you haven’t developed a habit of gratitude, you might find that even though you know you’re grateful for all the good things in your life, you haven’t been expressing that gratitude very well.  Now’s the time to change that.  Go out of your way to make sure that any people on your list know that they’re on it.  Express gratitude in simple but sincere ways, and do so frequently.  Expressing gratitude for the non-living things on your list is a good way to reinforce the idea of gratitude within yourself.  So go ahead and tell your house that you’re grateful to it for keeping your warm and dry, even if you feel a bit silly talking to your house.  It’s not the house that needs to hear it.  It’s you.  The more you express gratitude, the more you’ll start to feel it.  And as gratitude takes a strong hold in your daily thoughts, competition and comparison will have less room to roam around in your head.
Surround yourself with people who express gratitude as well.  And then focus on how lucky you are to have them in your life instead of focusing on whether they have a nicer house, car, vacation destination, or whatever it is that tends to push your comparison buttons.  Instead of competing with the people around you to see who can acquire the most status symbols, focus on people who don’t care about status symbols in the first place.  Talk to your closest friends about your desire to feel more gratitude and less competition.  You might find that they’re feeling the same way and you can help each other feel more contented with what you already have.
If there are aspects of your life that you’ve tended to compare negatively to people around you, take an honest look at your situation and ask yourself if you need to make some changes.  Simply wishing that you earned as much money as your college roommate will not make it so. But maybe there are steps that you can take to increase your income if that’s in line with the rest of your goals.
Do you feel jealous when your friend describes her far-flung vacations while you haven’t left the state in five years?  Instead of just succumbing to the bummer that is negative comparison, focus on the positive options you have:  You can ask your friend what she does to make her vacations a reality.  You might find that she’s a super-saver, scrimping in other areas of her budget to save up for her trips.  Once you know how she does it, maybe you can implement some of her tricks and start planning your own incredible journey.
But what if your friend makes twice as much money as you do, and the simple fact is that she can afford fancy vacations and you can’t?  That’s where gratitude comes in.  Picture the last vacation you took - even if it was just a camping weekend 20 miles from home - and remember how much fun you had.  Focus on what was good about it, instead of wishing it had been on an tropical island instead.  And as for your friend who takes awesome vacations?  Remind yourself that you’re grateful for her friendship and glad that she’s part of your life.  Tell her that.  And then focus on the good things that you have that don’t require a huge salary.  This will take some practice, especially if you’re used to negative thinking and making critical comparisons about your life.  But the more you do it, the easier it will get.  And the more you do it, the more opportunities you’ll see for simple pleasures in life - things that will truly make you feel grateful without any need for advertising to suck you in.

Frugal Babe is a mid-30s American wife and mama who has been careful with money since childhood and loves the flexibility that her frugality has given her. She is the face behind the Frugal Babe website and a contributor to the CareOne Debt Relief Services blog, a community that provides debt consolidation and money-saving advice.

Sponsor Chase All Your Dreams In October

As some of you know, I used to use Passionfruit. But ever since they started charging users and I can't afford that, I decided to use another sponsor site. I'm now using Adproval. They're 100% free and you can pretty much do the same thing as you did on Passionfruit. So, if you'd like to swap ads for October, use the site below.

Currently

Today, I'm linking up for Currently with Randalin at Harvesting Kale.  

You can use themes below or use your own - just tell us what's 'currently' going on in your life! This week's themes are: changing, remembering, needing, cleaning, feeling. 

My relationship currently changed from in a relationship to engaged yesterday. My boyfriend (now fiance) of 8 months proposed to me at the beach on Wednesday. The seasons are also changing now. We're going from summer to autumn soon. I love both seasons and I'm starting to love autumn a bit more. But right now, we're in that awkward time of year where you need a little jacket in the morning and at night, but during the day, with the sun out and all, you don't need anything. You're constantly putting something on and then taking it off and then putting it back on later. It's quite annoying.

I'm currently remembering my time at college. just graduated this past May with an Associates in Liberal Arts. Today, I finally picked up my degree and now I'm officially a college graduate!

I currently NEED a job! I need extra money so I can get my life started. I need new clothes. I need to shop for birthday presents and Christmas presents. I need new accessories, new music, and so much more. But first, I need a job. And I'm having the hardest time finding one and getting one.

I'm currently working on cleaning my room. As someone who doesn't like to clean, this will be a never ending process.

I'm currently feeling happy and nice autumn breeze right now. The sun's out, low humidity, beautiful breeze, and it's in the low 70's this week. Can it get any better than this? And can it just stay like this all year around? Please?

xx Courtney

A Love Letter

Dear Jose,

What can I say? These past 8 months have been great and amazing. Yes, we've had our ups and downs, fought, and we've definitely been on rollercoasters, but at the end of the day we get through the rough patches and we still love each other. I never thought we'd make it this far, but I saw potential in us and I made sure not to give up on us. You're the love of my life, my future husband, and the future father to my kids. I can't wait for the day that we are married, we start our life together, we have kids of our own, and grow old together. I love how comfortable I am around you; how I can joke around you, act silly, tell you anything that's on my mind, laugh with you, cry with you, you're always there for me, etc. I really can't put into words how you make me feel. You're an amazing guy. You're wonderful, the best, the sweetest, the most caring, funny, loving, jokester, and the most incredible guy that I've ever met. To me you're perfect, I love everything about you. You mean everything to me; you're my life and world. I couldn't have asked for a better man and I wouldn't want anyone else. I'm so glad we met and I gave you a chance. I don't know where I'd be without you. You've helped me so much. You've helped me overcome so many things and you've taught me a lot, like the subway and bus system, politics, law, etc. I know you've been through a lot, with relationships and your personal life. I know things have been said to you in the past and those words have hurt, but I will never leave you or hurt you. I will always be here for you, no matter what. I will always love you no matter what. I love you to death. I'm so proud of you of how far you've come. I know you're going to make it far in life, you're going to become successful, and all your dreams and hopes are going to come true. You have a lot of passions and ambitions and that's a wonderful thing. Keep chasing those dreams my love.

Forever and always,

xx Courtney

A Self Portrait

This is my high school senior year book picture from 2009. I haven't changed much; I never age. People who don't know me well, think I'm 16 or 17 (it's also because I'm short like a teen). I'm 22 and I don't look it. I hate being mistaken for a teen, but as my om keeps saying, one day I'll appreciate looking young. 

xx Courtney

Let's Go Shopping

 NYC is hot today! Rare for us in early September. It's 91 degrees today and I love it. I love it because it reminds me of the actual summer. It reminds me of school ending, outdoor summer concerts (like Warped Tour), the beach, and other summer fun. Summer's my favorite season, next to the fall; but I'm not fully ready for the fall and the crisp weather. But I also hate the hot weather. I get cranky and I don't do well in it. 

Anyway, today's blogtember prompt: Share links to your favorite online shops, preferably with a few photos of your favorite items in each shop.

I love Etsy. My favorite place for handmade stuff, vintage things, and supplies. Here are my favorites.

Mermaid Russian Dolls

Aren't these adorable and beautiful?

Mint Peach Geometric Necklace

I love these colors together. 

Girly Chevron Hair Bow

Turquoise Yarn Wreath

This is beautiful. 

Mason Jars - Peacock Colors

I love peacock colors. 

Turquoise Druzy Necklace 

Turquoise is my favorite color, next to purple. 

Tooth Fairy Pillow House

Isn't this adorable? 

Aqua Pendant Necklace

This aqua pendant is beautiful. Aqua is such a lovely color. 

Rose Flower Necklace

I love the colors and the rose here. 

French Beaded Flower Barrette 

Beautiful. This would look lovely in my hair. 

Mint Pendant

Beautiful. 

Yellow Sakura Flower Necklace

I love the colors here, especially the yellow rose.

Tribal Headband

I really like this headband. The colors are great. 

Russian Doll Brooch

This is so cute. 

Mixed Stone Leather Wrap Bracelet

I always wanted one of these bracelets. 

Moustache Octopus Plush

Isn't he cute? 

Ceramic Skulls

I love these type of skulls. 

xx Courtney

High School

I came across Chantelle of Fat Mum Slim's 50 Things To Blog About yesterday. So starting today I'll be following each prompt. 

With everyone going back to school, what's a better way than to talk about my high school years. 

That thing that happened in high school that pretty much changed your life forever. 

My high school years they....well...sucked. I had friends, but I was socially awkward. Didn't date, wasn't in any clubs or theatre productions, didn't go to any parties or prom, I didn't get in trouble, I wasn't popular, I was in cheerleading, etc. I didn't do much, I hated my high school years. I was in choir though and in senior year I decided to join my class in a mosh pit during the pep rally. Due to that pep rally, our Halloween party was cancelled; no costumes or anything. High school didn't change my life. I got through it, graduated, and that's about it. In senior year I thought a guy in my history class had a crush on me, we had a Christmas party and Valentine's day party (which sucked). All the girls got a rose during Valentine's day from guys or their friends and I got none. 

But now as I look back on it, that's ok. I now have a wonderful fiance who I get to spend every Valentine's day with. They say high school are the best 4 years of your life, for me it wasn't, but that's alright. I'm having the best years of my life now. 

xx Courtney